When we think of a mother’s bond within the Boleyn family, it would be quite natural for us to think of the mother and daughter relationship of Anne Boleyn and her daughter Elizabeth. It is a relationship of ultimately sadness, that can tug at our heartstrings but because of that, it has some standing in importance to the future events and glorious history to come. Both being Tudor Queens too bring a sence of specialty to this mother and daughter bond.
However, when I think of a mother and daughter bond within the Boleyn family, I must admit I think of a different mother and daughter relationship all together. It may not have the glamour of being two Tudor Queens but the characters of these women, the strong willed intelligence that was often lying just underneath the surface of this mother and daughter relationship ricocheted down the centuries to our modern day, making me at least feel that the Tudors, or perhaps more importantly, the Boleyns are not actually that far away from us at all.
The mother and daughter bond I suggest is of Anne’s sister, Mary Boleyn and her daughter Katherine Carey…
The date was 22nd June 1528 and with the death of William Carey, Mary Boleyn’s life was turned upside down.
Her husband had died at a young age leaving her poor, as all of lands had been passed to her son. It seemed at first that her father had distanced himself from her when she needed him, only giving her a place to live by the insistence of the King. Her son was given into the care of her sister, who she may or may not have liked and she still had another child to try to bring up on her own.
Looking at this moment in time in one way, we could see this as Mary had fell out of favour, Mary was in debt, and in those circumstances within the Tudor period, Mary Boleyn was considered a very poor woman indeed. It could very well be suggested that a Boleyn that had fallen far from the status they had gained and sadly for Mary, she did it very fast.
However, looking at this moment in another way, a Boleyn Mary still was and I am very fascinated that in this moment Mary does not crumble and fall by the wayside. It may seem from the outside that she doesn’t fight back because she doesn’t react like other family members, perhaps showing there is a huge difference between Mary and her more known sister, Anne.
Time and time again one of the many differences between the sisters Boleyn is shown, is recorded, but only if we can look for it by perhaps thinking a little outside the box with Mary Boleyn.
Maybe we can come together and find Mary of a different ilk to what has been suggested before, maybe we can, at a time when we can think of the historical past and its people in a different light, think against the suggested notion that Mary was the weak link of the Boleyn family, against the suggested notion that Mary was the meek and quiet one and so being was not a ‘true Boleyn’.
One of the largest differences between the sisters Boleyn is how they deal with problems. Place Anne in Mary’s stead at this moment in Mary’s life when Mary had lost so much and what would Anne have done?
Of course, it is a difficult question to answer as we don’t have hindsight on our side, but is there a possibility Anne would have instantly fought back? Would she have found some way to instantly make her voice heard? Anne was a very forceful natured woman, so this could well have been a possibility.
What would the outcome have been? Probably, knowing some of her previous, she might well have got her own way but at what cost? How many people might she angered or annoyed by the ‘manner’ of which she had gotten her own way?
With this in mind, it is interesting when we look at Mary’s wants in life. Yes, she may not have wanted as much as her sister nor on such high a level, but she still had wants. She still wanted a better life for her and her family and when, at times these were taken from her, she did not just accept her fate.
She fought, but not in the same way as her sister. Anne could be suggested as coming at a problem hard like a wrecking ball. Mary instead, could be suggested as chipping away at the problem, like a finely skilled Stone Mason at work, for the same ultimate outcome but without the enemies in tow.
So, Mary uses this moment, this fall from grace, this ‘no need of her at court’, to be a mother to the child left to her at the time, Katherine.
It is quite possible the first few years of Katherine’s life was spent with her mother, away from court at Hever Castle. It is quite possible Katherine had her mother’s full attention on her and we can only imagine what bond this would have built between mother and daughter Boleyn. A bond that could be said to run through, from mother to daughter and even to granddaughter.
By Amanda Harvey Purse
Being a Fellow of the Royal Historical Society for a few years now, Amanda has written academic papers for universities and special events including the Hampton Court Palace Field of the Cloth of Gold event. She has written articles for many magazines, websites and societies, including: Dan Snow’s History Hit, The Anne Boleyn Files, The Whitechapel Society Journal, The True Crime Dagger Magazine, The Charles Dickens Society, Books Reviews and More website, Rotten Ramsgate website and Tudor Secrets and Myths Facebook page.
Amanda has been a historical researcher for museums, books and television programmes on a range of subjects of time periods while writing historical books, the titles of which include: Martha, the life and times of Martha Tabram, a suggested victim of Jack the Ripper. Jack and Old Jewry: The City of London Policemen who Hunted the Ripper, published by Mango Books the award-winning, Inspector Reid: The Real Ripper Street and The Cutbush Connections: In Blood, In Flowers and in the Ripper case, the life, case and family of Superintendent Charles Henry Cutbush.
She is the author of The Boleyns: From the Tudors to the Windsors, published by Amberley Publishing. She is currently working on a number of historical projects, including another book with Amberley Publishing.
ahpurse's Blog: Tudor and Victorian Historian 